HOW WE BUILT RELATIONSHIP INTIMACY
Not long ago, I was brainstorming for a great date night idea that could be fun for both of us. My wife and I have had some pretty amazing experiences together. We’ve travelled the world, and done unforgettable things. But this time I was looking for a different kind of experience. I was in the mood for a really unforgettable sexual experience.
We’ve been married over a decade now and although we’ve shared many experiences outside of the bedroom, I felt that our experiences inside the bedroom had become more routine. This realization that things had plateaued did not make me worried nor sad. No, I got a bit excited. Because I know that we both love each other very much. And I thought to myself,
“There is a sexual connection between us and we should celebrate that!”
So began my journey into creating something incredibly amazing. What started out as sexual desire, had evolved into a weekend-long date night rendezvous. Including a lingerie-clad role-play scenario for the bedroom. As I said, it all started with a desire. Not a fantasy. There is a difference between fantasy and desire. To clarify in an example,
I was not so much interested in kissing Spiderman’s girl. I was interested in having my wife kiss me like I’m Spiderman.
I had a desire for a passionate kiss. I had a desire for a flirty conversation. I had a desire for seduction. I had a desire for foreplay. And I love lingerie. But lingerie doesn’t always summon passionate kisses and charged emotional connection. I needed to think of a date night that facilitates flirty conversation, seduction and passionate kisses.
It was getting close to Halloween. Shoulder season for the resort town of Whistler, BC. A time when the locals get discounted hotel rates and dinner specials are featured. So with my wife’s consent, I took advantage of our timing and booked two nights in a hotel suite. Followed up by dinner reservations and a pair of day tickets to the spa.
Our date night idea had turned into a weekend-long staycation event. We could spend the days together shopping around and strolling through the village. While Sunday was booked to be a spa day together. So that left dinners and evenings to think of something that evokes sexual desire between us. Lingerie certainly looks sexy. But I wanted her lingerie to feel sexy as well.
SEDUCE ME –
Lingerie Themed Role-play
In the spirit of the upcoming Halloween, I was in the mood for costumes and dressing up. But I needed to ensure that my wife felt as good as she looks while wearing lingerie. So I came up with this idea of having several outfits be the wardrobe for a cast of characters I would create. Maybe these lingerie-clad personalities could be a fun way to feel sexy too. And so, Madame Clair’s Divine Dime’s was conceived. A role-play scenario where Madame Clair introduces her wealthy client Jon Lover to her 10 unique mistresses. Jon meets each girl separately and then chooses who will spend the night with him.
ROMANCE ME –
Make A Connection
Now that I had my desire for seduction taken care of, it was time to focus on ways we could flirt and have a more emotional connection. Something like this should include dinner plans. So I booked reservations at a romantic restaurant. Again, in the spirit of Halloween, I thought maybe we should go to dinner in costume. No one would think anything about our strange identities. And so I created Blind Date. The instructions were simple. “Design your own fantasy Bachelor/Bachelorette and meet each other at the restaurant for a blind date.
I arrived at the idea of making a handmade invitation card. Even tho I had already asked my wife if we could plan a sexy rendezvous weekend, I was still nervous about explaining the details of my date night. So I made up a third party syndicate called Fantasy Weekends. The card arrived in the mail with a personal invitation for my wife and me.
We read the card together and both agreed to the instructions handed out by Fantasy Weekends. Over the next month, we each prepared for our weekend tasks. Planning and sharing a sexual fantasy together was an incredibly bonding experience. As a side goal, we both agreed to eat clean, avoid alcohol, and exercise together every day until the big date. I had no idea this weekend challenge could bring us together in so many little ways. I have been blogging about it since our first weekend.